The Man in The Shed

 15th March Hot in Kiev

Back to Thursdays ! How UEFA expect fans to get to games for 6pm (in the ground or at home) is beyond me. At least this time the Chelsea fans at home could dash off to a local pub or bar after work. After last week’s shenanigans trying to watch the home leg by connecting a laptop to two tin cans and a piece of string I was glad to be sitting down in my own lounge hoping for a better viewing experience.

So the inevitable squad rotation – with Hazard, Luiz, Dave and Jorginho wrapped in thick coats and blankets. But opportunities for Loftus-Cheek, Hudson-Odoi and Christensen. With Alonso playing in this game it appears that Emerson has edged ahead as the number one left back now.

The first thing that struck me was that it surely could not be as cold as I was expecting over in the Ukraine – there were players with short sleeved shirts on. But Rudiger with short sleeves and gloves – really ? And the Kiev right back was wearing 94 – don’t start me on that again. It can’t be his lucky number.

So I was barely settled and we’d scored ! I hadn’t even had a chance to consider where the team were mentally, going in with a three nil lead. Giroud with an instinctive first time finish after a corner is deflected to him. How could this guy be so lethal in this competition and he cannot buy a goal in the league ?

We continued to dominate. I began to realise that this Kiev team really weren’t that good after all. Perhaps the TV director was also feeling embarrassed as he kept panning to the crowd to show their star striker (presumably injured - alongside his stereotypical footballer girlfriend) as a way to justify their lack of attacking intent. They did manage a disallowed goal after around 20 minutes. Offside ! It made me realise that our defence this season seems to catch the opposition offside quite regularly.

Then Loftus-Cheek, demonstrating yet again how hard it is to knock him off the ball, feeds Alonso who puts in a killer cross for another first-time Giroud finish. We really are enjoying our football now.

The half ends as well as it began with a great one-two between Hudson-Odoi and Giroud; Hudson-Odoi crosses and there’s our left back cum centre forward Alonso to tap in.

Three nil at half time. This had been a very enjoyable half of football.

So if it is hard to motivate a team who were three nil up after the first leg, what do you say to them at six nil after three quarters of the tie ?

The second half began with ironic cheers from the home fans as Kiev finally managed a shot on target. Clearly, realising that the home fans were still awake had a galvanising effect on the home players as the next few minutes was all Kiev – hitting the post and then another offside goal.

That was about as good as it got for Kiev. One final attempt to wake up their team after an hour when all the fans turned on their mobile phone torches and that was it.

Chelsea were clearly still up for some more goals. A great free kick from Willian and Giroud completed “the perfect hat trick” with a header. A brilliant free kick from Alonso was well saved and then Giroud sets up Hudson-Odoi for a fifth. If we could get through the rest of the game without further injuries it would be a perfect day. The game ends with no sign of a stretcher – job done.

Plenty of positives from this game to take away. Loftus-Cheek played well again and lasted 90 minutes. The so-called second string looked really fluent. Our rested quartet would be fresh for the next challenge. Our back four do a mean offside trap. Even the officials went old school and wore all black.

Despite it being F A Cup weekend we still have a game – off to Everton.